Caring for elderly parents can mean anything from helping with the weekly shop to arranging professional care as their needs change. For many families, the challenge is knowing how much support to provide while still respecting a parent’s independence and wishes.
Whether your parents are largely independent or beginning to need more help at home, there are practical steps you can take to support their safety, wellbeing and quality of life.
1. Understand what support your parents need
Before making changes or arranging care, take time to understand what your parents can manage independently and where they may be struggling.
Look at everyday activities such as:
- Washing and dressing
- Preparing meals
- Managing medication
- Shopping and household tasks
- Getting around the home
- Attending appointments
- Managing stairs and getting in and out of bed
- Staying socially connected
Try to have this conversation with your parents rather than making decisions on their behalf. They may have concerns about losing their independence, so giving them an opportunity to explain what they want is an important part of planning support.
If you’re unsure what level of help they need, a care needs assessment can provide a more structured assessment of their needs and abilities.
2. Keep everyday routines familiar
Regular routines can make everyday life easier to manage and provide a sense of familiarity.
Where possible, work around your parents’ existing routines rather than changing them unnecessarily. You might agree particular days for shopping, appointments or family visits, for example.
Most importantly, involve your parents in decisions about their routine. The aim should be to support their independence, not take control of their day.
3. Make the home safer
Take a walk around your parents’ home and consider whether there are any avoidable hazards.
Look out for:
- Loose rugs or flooring
- Clutter on stairs and walkways
- Poor lighting
- Unsecured electrical cables
- Slippery bathroom surfaces
- Items stored where they need to stretch or climb to reach them
- Stairs that are difficult to use safely
Simple changes can make the home easier to navigate. Depending on your parent’s needs, an occupational therapist may also be able to recommend appropriate adaptations or equipment.
For more advice on making the home safer and more suitable, see our guide to home adaptations for the elderly.
4. Help your parents stay active
Encourage your parents to remain as active as is appropriate for their abilities.
This doesn’t necessarily mean formal exercise. Walking, gardening, gentle movement or taking part in activities they enjoy can all help them maintain their usual routines and social connections.
If you’re concerned about your parent starting a new exercise routine because of their health or mobility, encourage them to speak to an appropriate healthcare professional first.
5. Help them stay socially connected
Keeping in touch with friends, family and the wider community can be an important part of wellbeing.
If you don’t live nearby, regular phone or video calls can help you stay connected. You could also help your parents attend local groups, meet friends or continue hobbies they enjoy.
If getting out has become difficult, companionship care may provide another way of maintaining social interaction while also offering practical support at home.
6. Keep an eye out for changes
One of the most useful things you can do as a family member is notice changes that your parent may not mention themselves.
These might include:
- Difficulty preparing meals
- Increasing problems with mobility
- Changes in personal hygiene
- Missed appointments or medication
- Increased confusion or forgetfulness
- Unexplained changes in mood
- Withdrawal from activities they previously enjoyed
- Difficulty managing household tasks
One change on its own doesn’t necessarily mean your parent needs professional care. However, a pattern of changes or a noticeable decline in their ability to manage everyday activities is worth discussing with them and, where appropriate, their GP or another healthcare professional.
7. Talk about care before there is a crisis
It can be tempting to wait until your parents can no longer manage before discussing professional care. Planning earlier can give everyone more time to consider the options.
Talk to your parents about:
- What help they would be comfortable receiving
- Whether they want to remain living at home
- What they would like their care to look like
- Who they would want involved in decisions
- What they would do if their needs increased
These conversations don’t need to happen all at once. Starting gradually can make the subject feel less daunting.
For more guidance, see our guide to holding a family meeting about your elderly parents’ care.
8. Explore the different types of care available
There isn’t one type of home care that works for everyone. The right option depends on your parent’s needs, preferences and how much support they require.
Options can include:
- Visiting care: A professional carer visits at agreed times to provide support with everyday tasks, personal care, medication prompts or companionship.
- Live-in care: A professional carer lives in the home and provides ongoing support throughout the day, helping the person maintain their usual routines and independence.
- Complex care: Specialist care for people with more complex health needs, delivered by carers with appropriate training and experience.
- Overnight or 24-hour care: Additional support for people who need assistance during the night or more continuous care.
9. Involve healthcare professionals where appropriate
If your parent has health conditions or their needs are changing, their healthcare team can help you understand what support may be appropriate.
A care needs assessment can also help establish what your parent can do independently, where they need assistance and what support could help them remain at home.
Where care is arranged, a personalised care plan should set out the support required and how it should be delivered. This should be reviewed when your parent’s needs change.
10. Look after yourself too
Supporting an elderly parent can be rewarding, but it can also become physically and emotionally demanding, particularly if you are balancing caring responsibilities with work, family or other commitments.
Be realistic about what you can provide yourself. You don’t have to take on every responsibility simply because you’re a family member.
Professional home care can provide additional practical support while allowing you to remain involved in your parent’s life.
When should you consider professional home care?
There is no single point at which every older person needs professional care.
It may be worth considering additional support if your parent is:
- Struggling with everyday personal care
- Having difficulty preparing meals
- Finding it increasingly difficult to move around safely
- Missing medication or appointments
- Becoming socially isolated
- Struggling to manage household tasks
- Experiencing changes in health that require closer monitoring
- Relying increasingly on family members for everyday support
The amount of care required can also change over time. Some people may only need a few visits each week, while others may eventually benefit from live-in care.
How Trinity Homecare can help
If your parent would benefit from additional support at home, Trinity Homecare provides personalised visiting and live-in care designed around their individual needs, routines and preferences.
Care can be adapted as those needs change, helping your parent remain in the home they know and love while giving family members additional reassurance.
We can arrange a care needs assessment to discuss your parent’s circumstances and explore the most appropriate options.
Talk to Trinity Homecare today
If you’re considering care for an elderly parent, our friendly care team can provide information and advice with no obligation.
Call us on 0207 183 4884 in confidence for a free no obligation quotation. If enquiring outside of our opening hours, please complete our online form and we will contact you the next day.
